Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Orphan Sunday

We had the privilege to be part of something called "Orphan Sunday" in our church just a few days ago. A small group of us really desire to share the need for the church to stand up and obey God when he tells us to care for the orphan and the widow. Thankfully, our church stood behind us and allowed us to use this past Sunday's service to that end. (Many churches were doing the same thing on the same day, which is exciting and encouraging to me.)

About 5 of us shared our involvement and experiences with orphan care and adoption, our Pastor shared about the blessing of obedience to the Lord in this area, and we even had worship music that reflected God's heart for the fatherless. My heart was in its element.

I was really nervous to share in front of so many people (and we don't even have an extremely large church!), in fact... I often thought as I prayed about what I should share in the month before, that I would MUCH rather write it all up so people could read it. But the bottom line was that this was important. Much more important than my being nervous. SO, I kept praying for God to lift the anxiousness. He was so faithful. I was still a bit nervous, but I was able to say what was on my heart, and even went so far as to add things not in my notes! That, for me, is incredible... :) So, I KNOW that the Lord was giving me courage and words to share. In fact, some of what I said, I can't even remember!
Jason shared the basics of our journey so far... and what God's been teaching us through it. I loved hearing him share! Here's the gist of what I shared : (And I struggled with my emotion through a good part of it.)
I think that what we have been learning in the past 3 years is that this life is just not about us. It is not about my comfort. It is not about my ease. It's not about my agenda. It's about God's. It's about giving ourselves away. It's simply about seeking Jesus and obeying him.

It's the obedience part that can be tricky.

But we are to take Jesus' name, and love, and light into places that are dark, and hard, and difficult, and dangerous.

That is where orphans abound.

We have experienced that war is being waged over the fatherless... because our God, who is Father to the fatherless, pursues them, and so does his enemy. If we engage in this battle, we're in the middle of the war.

During the year we searched in foster care to adopt children who needed a family, we were stretched in so many instances. The Lord seemed to bring us to so many children who were WAY different than we thought we were open to originally. Each time, he seemed to be saying, "What about these children... would you take them?" And each time, we struggled through our fear and our doubt to get to the point where we said, "Yes, Lord." But each time, God would then shut the door. We pursued a sibling group of four children. Crazy! But, we got willing, and God closed the door. He brought along a little guy who was HIV positive, and I struggled through the very real possibility of having to watch him die. We got to the point where we were willing to let our hearts be broken in that way, and God shut the door. It happened again and again. Many, many kids. I don't pretend to understand all the reasons, but I do know that our hearts were broken over and over again for his children... all sorts of his children. And I'm glad. I don't want that to be different.

We've seen that there is a war over them all. I can stand up and fight for them, act in respond in obedience to Jesus' commands, or I can pretend that he doesn't mind when I look the other way.
But, honestly, it's difficult and risky for me to stand up and fight for people I don't know. So- the Lord has given us the past three years to get to know some orphans. Face to face. He's opened our eyes to what this war is all about.

It's ugly... and frustrating... and heartbreaking at times. It's caused us to depend on the Lord as we've never had to before. It's SO worth it though, because while obedience is painful, God is an incredible rewarder. Our family has experienced true HOPE and PEACE and JOY... even in the midst of some very difficult realities. Our hearts have been broken over his children, but I can now truthfully say that I wouldn't want it any other way.

What a crazy three years it's been. What a refining and reshaping time it's been. We are no where closer to parenting orphaned kids at this point, since we have no idea what will happen in Liberia, but God has certainly developed a heart in us for his children. In fact, it's only because of the many trials and shut doors that our eyes have been opened to the larger need. We are in this for good now. Forever. Just not sure what that means yet. :)

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